Less Wonder
I was never taught how
to properly gut a fish, only told
to place them in a dry bucket
I’d watch as they’d thrash
and choke on air. Which knife
should I choose and where do I make
the first incision. At what angle
do I groove through her bones
Spoon her eyes with a bloodied finger
or freeze under their dying stare
When cutting her fins, should
I repurpose them into origami
cranes, turtles or fish. I could believe
her guts dye blue or green or black
depending on where you hook her
Do her scales singe at human touch
or hush like paintbrush hairs
Would you say I’m a gutless wonder
I cried when Dad called me that
He yelled to hold the yellow herring
high for a photo. I knew I could not
touch something I had killed
I wouldn’t know what to keep or toss
I want to throw some of it back
I want to throw all of her back.
first published by Voiceworks in their issue 121, “Root” published in Jan, 2021